“I don’t know what you’re doing but keep doing it.” My oncologist knows that I attribute my ability to subdue the effects of cancer to the practice of Qigong. He’s mystified by my practices, and in awe.
“…keep doing it.”
When I was diagnosed first with Leukemia and then Merkel Cell Carcinoma he asked me if I wanted to know my prognosis, how long do I have to live?
No, I’m good. That’s up to me.
Lymphocytes have mutated, multiplying irregularly. Cancer cells, bad guys, are creating tumors and harassing my lymph nodes. I’m faced with bullies.
Being bullied is not new to me. As a kid I was not like the other boys. I drew attention to myself by pretending to be a bird flying across the playground. Ecstasy!
The other boys called me names; they threatened me verbally and physically. I was branded. I disconnected and was afraid. I built a wall. I hid. I was lonely, but safe. I hid my dreams of flying.
And now as a grown man another bully has moved onto the playground. Cancer.
My response? I spread my wings and fly like a bird. I unabashedly flap my wings with friends in parks, contentedly drawing the attention of people passing by. They stare, we smile. I’m empowered. I’ve reclaimed my crane.
Give yourself the gift of slowing down. Let yourself fall into the rhythm of nature. Allow yourself to feel the breeze, hear the creek, notice the colors of the leaves, bask in the warmth of the sun. Stop and gaze at the moon. Let yourself appreciate the changing seasons and the interdependence of the elements. Welcome trees, rivers, clouds, the moon, the stars, the mountains, and the animals as your teachers.
My oncologist is curious and in awe. What AM I doing? I am pouncing like a tiger and grabbing fruit like a cheeky monkey. I’m standing like a tree and moving like water. I’m dropping on my heels to create vibration and reaching upwards to feel expansiveness. I’m dancing with rainbows and moving my hands like clouds. I’m scooping water from the sea and reaching for the heavens. I’m creating space in my body, mind, and spirit.
I’m living.
I am balancing Eastern and Western modalities as I fight this disease. I attribute my physical and mental state of well being to Qigong and acupuncture; but I also rely on immunotherapy, surgery, radiation, all the things.
During our Friday morning Qigong practices we will be flapping wings, practicing Crane forms.
I’ve chosen to start with forms as taught by Kseny as we focus on expansion, and compression. We begin curled up, asleep. And then we rise, we fly.
I hope that you will spread your wings and fly!
I love you all.
Brian
No comments:
Post a Comment